Playing the victim

Disclaimer: No one person should feel offended, everyone is different and not all men are the same. If you feel you are contrary to this post then feel free to comment below or at least feel a level of content in knowing you’re not that guy. I do not condone cheating and nothing in this piece should be seen to be supporting it. And yes I know...girls can do it too.

Now this isn’t a rant, more of an elaborated discussion and it's only touching on one part of a big issue.

Ladies, double standards are something we are used to right? Not that we should be but either way we’re used to it and its ‘reasoning’

Back in school times there was also this reoccurring argument of it being more acceptable for guys to cheat than it is girls, and it's pretty much stayed that way. Even though I have the same attitude towards the discussion I have to say my reasoning behind it has definitely changed.

As a young lady I’m being cultured to believe that if I guy cheats it doesn’t mean as much as if a girl does. Now first things first cheating, be it by a man, woman or Martian is unacceptable – but since when did guys get the pass to be able to do it and in essence get away with it?

These are some of the excuses I've come across.

“Well for a guy it's just casual, but for a girl it means she must really like the guy”

“With girls you go inside – reference to intercourse - whereas guys it's not that intimate”

“When guys cheat it's not serious, just sex”

I’m not a feminist, may support some of their opinions but essentially I’m not. Why are females branded the ‘devil’ for doing anything even close to what guys have been doing to girls for years?

And here’s where we see guys playing the victim.

A dose of their own medicine. Some guys are quick to cheat, but the same individuals are even faster to say they would leave a girl if they did the same. How can you play the victim to something you’ve done before? Now don’t get me wrong some guys are hurt by girls and may have a clean past. But some individuals need to remember the idea of karma. I see it as karma comes back 10 fold, so it is right for an individual to be made to feel somehow, by someone who did worse to him or her.

Now two wrongs don’t make a right and you shouldn’t be in a relationship where anyone is spiteful. These things just make you wonder. There are no excuses, if your ex hurt you that is not a reason to hurt the next person and it definitely shouldn’t justify anything you do wrong.

Girls are expected to take the guy back if they but guys wouldn't do the same.

You get into an altercation with your girl and then plead innocent when you're in the wrong.

You can't and shouldn’t make a girl feel any worse than you should if you were in her position just because she’s female. There has to be a level of equality somewhere.

It doesn't seem like something that will be accepted straight away but either way you can't be a victim of your own crime.