Forgive&Forget

All men are the same?

Once you factor out; Age, culture, Religion, upbringing, Experiences, common sense…

What I’m trying to say is we are all the same at some point (excluding race and gender as a factor), as we grow that’s when we differentiate, become the individuals we are today, and can say why or how we are different from the next person.

This is mainly aimed at the ladies (but guys switch men to women and its applicable too) because if anything we are the ones expected to say ‘guys are all the same’. Now there’s no point in getting at a girl and telling her ‘it’s her fault for trying them all’ it goes without saying, that after a loophole of experiences it is easy to come to such a conclusion.

Who is to blame?

It takes two to tango, two to make a situation, and it definitely takes two to communicate – well communicate well anyway. Now I am definitely not saying one party should take the blame, but sometimes reflect before retaliating and try placing yourself on the other side.

If they are all the same, why are you ending up with the same? Have you changed? What have you changed? We attract what we portray and sometimes you have to swallow that truth before complaining. We ourselves sometimes don’t even realise what we reflect to others. Then again take that and realise some people really just do get the wrong impression, and that wont always be something you can change, some people like to prejudge and close their minds to you but then who are they anyway…next!

Identifier

It’s been said that we see ourselves differently to how others see us. Cheers to those that this doesn’t apply to. Ever asked your friends how they see you? What is your identifier? Firstly, your friends are usually a good reflection of you; but apart from your family they are the ones that should see you for who you are. Disclaimer: The word friend(s) isn’t used loosely in this context so know which “friends” you’re asking. Take any advice or criticism they give with a pinch of salt, apply your own common sense to it and then see if it works for you, here’s to hoping they want what’s best for you.

Boys will be boys

Boys being the key word. It is sometimes hard to admit you have a boy on your hands when you want or thought you had a man. Some will give you a list of things that will help you tell the difference, that isn’t always applicable when they tick some boxes and not others – leaving you to be in denial all over again. But ultimately ladies, you know what’s up. He doesn’t have to be like your dad (some of you wouldn’t want that anyway) but you know when you’re being treated according to your worth (blog on knowing your worth linked below). Boys will be boys, they are incapable of handling a strong and developed lady like you, so don’t beat them up when they fall short of doing so. Age wont determine what you end up with so don’t focus on that. Instead focus on you, MEN will know your worth, they will know if they are fit to approach you, and at that stage change should come.

Give a guy a chance, and don’t go searching for what you think you want, during your time of patience build yourself to be the woman you know you can be and the right guy will find you. Do something different, be different, and then you should come into something different.

And remember, the Alex, Josh, Michael, Tyrese or John that came before this one doesn’t have to affect the next one.